Facts:  Former major league slugger Manny Ramirez has again run afoul of the law.  His professional baseball career was in trouble due to a steroid-related 50 game suspension in 2009.  In 2010, he tried to get his career back on track, but another alleged positive test for steroids (along with a 100 game suspension) led to his quick retirement.

Now two years after baseball, Manny is in much more serious trouble.  Manny was arrested on Monday, September 12, 2011 for allegedly battering his wife, Juliana.  She claims that he struck her with an open hand, causing swelling on the left side of her face and leaving a contusion on the back of her head.  After the incident, Juliana immediately reported the domestic abuse to Florida authorities.  Manny was arrested soon after and has been ordered to have no contact with her.  

Law:  Florida Statute 741.28 defines domestic violence as "any assault, battery, sexual assault, or any criminal offense resulting in physical injury or death of one family or household member by another who is or was residing in the same single dwelling unit.”  Simply put, to prove Manny is guilty of domestic violence, the State of Florida must show that: (1) he assaulted or battered her (typically defined as an unwanted touching or hitting), (2) it caused injury, and (3) they were living together.  Manny has said that she hit her own head, but that’s something for the court to decide, not us.  As with most cases, the proof of the touching, or a showing of any injury at all, is good enough to show someone is guilty of the crime alleged.  It’s even more difficult to beat charges when the allegation is that a man hit a woman.

Analysis:  The truly remarkable part about this case is that Juliana was smart enough to report the incident to the appropriate authorities as soon as it happened.  Manny Ramirez is a former athlete with a history of steroid use.  The side effects of steroids are well-documented and usually include aggressive and abusive behavior.  It would have been easy for Juliana to accept the abuse and hope it never happened again.  Fortunately for Juliana, she made the right decision to report the incident.  Although it happens every day, domestic violence is considered one of the most underreported crimes.  Statistics show that 30% of Americans say they know a girlfriend or wife who has been abused in the previous year.  That is a truly large and depressing number.

Unfortunately, the first battery or assault rarely ends up being the last incident of abuse.  When the violence isn’t reported, it usually keeps happening until it is dealt with appropriately.  The best intervention is with a doctor or psychologist after you remove yourself from the dangerous situation.  The abuser likely has had other trouble with the law or is showing signs of uncontrollable behavior.  The best thing you can do for your relationship is to report the danger signs to appropriate authorities immediately before the situation turns violent.  

To really highlight this point, it is alleged that when Juliana made the call to the police, they asked if she was still in danger.  She told the police that Manny had stopped and had calmed down to the point where she could make the call.  I don’t mean to suggest that telling the abuser you have called the cops will end the abuse.  However, this shows that by taking the right steps, you are in a better position to resolve the issue as soon as possible to avoid harm.  You should not allow the situation to continue.  

In Juliana’s case, she may have waited too long and unfortunately ended up injured.  Thankfully, her physical injuries appear manageable, but the psychological effects of this type of abuse can last a lifetime.  By contacting the police, the courts have now ordered Manny to stay away from his wife. This is in the best interests of both parties until this situation resolves itself.  Hopefully, Manny will try to seek professional help to deal with his problems.  He cheated the game he loved, and his marriage is now in trouble.  If he truly wants to straighten his life out, he needs to start by changing his dangerous behavior.

If you suspect that your loved one is on the verge of abuse or has abused you, please visit the following website to find local help:  http://family.findlaw.com/domestic-violence/state-domestic-violence-forms.html. It may save your life.

Finally, if you believe you are at risk for abusing somebody you love, take matters into your own hands.  Having an abusive personality does not make you a bad person, but it means that you may need outside help to manage your anger.  Without someone else stepping in, you will likely be unable to control your anger, and this could cause you to hit another person or a loved one.  If this sounds like something you may struggle with, or have struggled with in the past, I urge you to visit the link above and find a local counselor to speak with before you ruin your life by assaulting and seriously injuring a loved one.